I just love it when women write articles telling men to "man up" or "butch up." Nothing reveals the cognitive dissonance that dominates the modern female image of the ideal man more than when they tell you precisely what a "real man" is. If a man wrote about "real women" in similar terms, women would be coming out of the woodwork demanding to know just who he thinks that he is to define a woman's life and personality for her.
When women write about what a "real man" is, they really are writing about what they want in a man. Usually this means that he is the sort of man who lets her do just about anything she damn well pleases, supports her every non-criminal decision, is sensitive to her needs and desires, sacrifices his own needs and desires for her whims, and through all of this maintains a non-threatening strength and grit that makes him attractive like a cowboy out of a 1950s western, without any of the things that might offend her. Yes, it's childish, but then what can you expect from people who have probably never seriously reflected on the personal cost required to "have it all?"
Now, in terms of hypocrisy, this takes the gold medal:
When women write about what a "real man" is, they really are writing about what they want in a man. Usually this means that he is the sort of man who lets her do just about anything she damn well pleases, supports her every non-criminal decision, is sensitive to her needs and desires, sacrifices his own needs and desires for her whims, and through all of this maintains a non-threatening strength and grit that makes him attractive like a cowboy out of a 1950s western, without any of the things that might offend her. Yes, it's childish, but then what can you expect from people who have probably never seriously reflected on the personal cost required to "have it all?"
Now, in terms of hypocrisy, this takes the gold medal:
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According to Cassy, a real man is supposed to be a provider. That part is supposed to be ingrained in him. However, a real man would never put his foot down and say to his wife that she is going to be a full time mother to her children, and that her job will not compromise her role as a mother and wife. Convenient, isn't it?
In fairness to Cassy, she mostly made up for that here, but I still don't think she really gets it.
The run-down housewife and over-worked husband myth needs to cease. If a woman wants to work outside the home, then that's great. A real man would encourage her to, if that's what she chose to do. But a real man would also accept her role as housewife if that was what she wanted -- even if it meant taking on extra financial responsibility.
According to Cassy, a real man is supposed to be a provider. That part is supposed to be ingrained in him. However, a real man would never put his foot down and say to his wife that she is going to be a full time mother to her children, and that her job will not compromise her role as a mother and wife. Convenient, isn't it?
In fairness to Cassy, she mostly made up for that here, but I still don't think she really gets it.
When women write about what a "real man" is, they really are writing about what they want in a man. Usually this means that he is the sort of man who lets her do just about anything she damn well pleases, supports her every non-criminal decision, is sensitive to her needs and desires, sacrifices his own needs and desires for her whims, and through all of this maintains a non-threatening strength and grit that makes him attractive like a cowboy out of a 1950s western, without any of the things that might offend her.
Very well-said. I couldn't agree more.